Hoping R.T.E. Can Improve the Food Cred at the Kaleidoscope - CLOSED

R.T.E. 

27741 Crown Valley Parkway #329-23

Mission Viejo, CA 92691

It's hard to review a restaurant in the Kaleidoscope and not mention my thoughts on what is wrong with this shopping center, which overlooks the 5 Freeway in Mission Viejo. It's tough now since you can see that the people who run this center, some would say cursed shopping center, are really trying.

We've made a few recent trips here, and the escalators have been working fine each time, which was a big gripe I've had with this two-level shopping center. Yes, the lighting in the underground parking structure is something right out of a horror movie, and the lack of good retail stores and giant anchor retailers is really holding this center back. You can still see them trying to make this ill-conceived center work.

Besides the functioning escalators, the significant addition at the Kaleidoscope is Union Market, a collection of small, independent retailers and, more importantly to me, specialty restaurants and food purveyors. The biggest draw to Union Market is the Portola Coffee Roasters, and for me, a non-coffee drinker, the fantastic Mr. Holmes baked goods they sell there. The cornflake cookie and the salted chocolate chip are delicious, as long as you get there early enough to grab them before they sell out. This visit to Union Market was not for coffee or cookies but to try one of their restaurants and meet up with my aunt and uncle for a long overdue dinner. We decided to give R.T.E. a try.

R.T.E. stands for Ready To Eat, and this is a barbecue on a-stick restaurant. Except for their ramen and sides, everything comes on short skewers here. The skewer portion of the menu is divided into three parts, land, ocean, and garden. Prices range between $1.95 to $4.95 for the scallops, and they do offer a combo that includes three skewers, pickles, and your choice of rice or salad. They also offer a happy hour in which pre-selected skewers are priced at a dollar off, and so are all the sides. Happy hour is every day from 4 to 7pm. Other menu items include sides like salads, peppers, rice, tater tots, and more. They also have a couple of dessert items, and be sure to check the chalkboards behind the bar for other specials they are running. Let's see what we ended up ordering this evening.

The food at R.T.E. came out to us in waves, and the first group was some of the sides we had ordered. It might have been because I was hungry, but the Tater Tots ($5) were satisfying. These little potato barrels came out perfectly, crunchy on the outside and soft inside, with a touch of truffle sea salt to keep things interesting. The House Salad ($6) was underwhelming. A spring mix of leafy greens was paired with a very mild sesame dressing. The dressing needed to be slightly punched in the flavor department to make it more noticeable. The Shishito Peppers ($6) was a pleasant surprise. They were lightly fried, dusted with a bit of sea salt, and had a great flavor. There were a couple peppers in there that really packed some heat. The Edamame ($4) was fine, but I did not get my fair share of them because my cousin Chris had a big pile of empty edamame pods stacked on his plate, almost to eye level. Thanks for sharing, Chris.

The central part of our meal came out on a platter. The meats, Short Rib ($3.95), Pork Belly ($2.95), and Chicken Thigh ($2.95), were all solid, but I was hoping for more meat on these. They were very thin. The Cherry Tomatoes ($2.95) were not my favorite, but I'm not a tomato kind of guy, even though I tried one of them. The Zucchini ($1.95) was more my style. I liked the light seasoning, and the grill marks added a subtle flavor.

Both Katie and my aunt Hiroko got a Bowl of Tonkotsu Ramen to accompany their skewers. Hiroko is a ramen expert, and she really enjoyed this version, which is not on the regular menu but was listed as one of the specials on the blackboards behind the bar. It featured a hard-boiled egg and plenty of green onion—a perfect vehicle for a rather chilly evening.

To be honest, I was only partially full after our skewers, so Katie returned to get me a few more meat options, and she also returned with a few more things. I liked the Brussels Sprouts ($2.95) but thought they needed to be cooked more as they were hard to bite. The Fried Plantains ($3.95) were mushy, but Katie liked them well enough. The Hojaldre ($2), listed on the menu as a Panamanian fry bread, was good, but it needed something else to go along with it. The second round of sides was not as good as our first.

R.T.E. was good but could have been better for big eaters like me. I liked the food here but thought it could have been a better value for what we paid. I'm not sure how we ended up paying $95 for our first round of food, even though it was happy hour. With the five of us, it worked out to almost $20 per person, and I still had to go back and have another two chicken skewers and some of the sides that Katie got on her second go-around. The sides, for the most part, were okay, but the standouts for me were the peppers and the tater tots. The red meat options were best for the proteins, but the pork belly was overcooked and did not have that characteristic pork belly feel that I have come to love. One thing that did shine at R.T.E. was the people working there. Service was first-rate, and they ensured we had everything we needed during our stay, even though we were seated behind the restaurant, out of their eyesight. Pretty impressed. We are impressed with some of the changes in the Kaleidoscope Shopping Center within the past year. At least they can say they are not the worst shopping center in OC anymore; that honor now goes to the Anaheim Garden Walk by a mile.

Out of five remote controls (because RTE is also the abbreviation for the public broadcasting system of Ireland), five being best to zero being worst, R.T.E. gets 2.5 remote controls.

For more information about R.T.E., head to their website here: https://www.rterestaurant.com/